We today live in a world in which we believe advocate support fairness and equality among religions, castes and genders, as it has finally dawned upon society, that while we labelled male or female upon our birth, gender is a multi-faceted entity, and it should never come in the way of equality and self-expression. After years of discrimination, women today are being treated better than before, they can work, are given all the rights and many systems created today, and in numerous societies, are considered equally capable as their male counterparts. However, although women are treated better before, it does not mean that the concepts we visualize are fair. Men are supposed to be strong and aggressive whereas girls are supposed to be weak and dependent on the latter. People are eager to know the gender of their children so that they can shop accordingly if it's a boy blue and a girl pink. A man dare not be spotted in pink for if he is, he will be deemed a pansy or gay. These kind of stereotypes are not naturally embedded into our minds, rather are bestowed upon us from the day we step into this world. Girls are taught to step out of the box and pursue their dreams, not to be restricted by gender. In order for that system to be successful, however, it has to be mutual. Men need to learn to embrace the wide range of emotions that society thought only women could feel, and society in turn, needs to eliminate all these sentiments of toxic masculinity.
The following poem is one that I wrote in my English exam in 7th grade. Our task was to imagine we were parents with the duty of educating our sons on equality so that they would be accepting individuals and never be victims of the tradition gender stereotypes that encapsulate society. In the end, I was able to realize that we are defined not by our gender but by our actions.
They say that you cannot cry
That you are to be made of stone,
but it takes a true man
to let his truest emotions be shown
They will say that you should work
And your wife should stay at home
but allow your wife to pursue her dreams
Let yourself do some of the chores
The say that you should be macho
That frustration and anger is your thing
But don't be fooled by that son,
You can be compassionate, deep and caring
They will say you are the sole provider,
That it is you duty to keep bellies full,
But know, if your wife does that as well,
Its not the least bit shameful
They say that you should be brave
That you should never shed a tear
But never forget you are human,
And all humans have fears
They will say you should love sports
And your wife will like fine arts
That you will have no similarities whatsoever,
Then how does a relationship start?
They will call you the sole provider,
Say that you are the head of the house
But you needn't be a lion
Your wife needn't be a mouse.
It doesn't matter if we are male of female
Or if we do things in a certain way
For we are same within our hearts
We are HUMANS at the end of the day
-Diya Hebbar
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